Dopamine
by MorrisonJD
Summary: Shawn realizes that he loves Angela, but is it too late for him to attain his euphoric utopia.


The poetry readings were to start in about an hour. Angela began to get ready, it was her fourth date with James and things were starting to look up. He was going to pick her up in about an hour, they were going to head to Trixie's, the local coffee shop and hear this weeks poems. Trixie's was a really casual place, so Angela decided on a pair of jeans, a fitted Led Zeppelin shirt, and a pair of black Chuck Taylors, her braids pulled back into a high ponytail, and her makeup light and earthy. Thats when she heard the knock at the door. She walked over and opened it. James stood there with his million dollar smile, and deep blue eyes.

"Ready to go hear some poetry babe?" James asked Angela. She nodded as she grabbed her purse off of the bed. Not knowing what the night had in store for her.

"Shawny, where are you taking me?" Cory asked as his friend led him into smoke filled coffee shop.

"A friend in my creative writing class said that this place has some good poetry and I was thinking about reading some here. You know around people who would appreciate it and aren't the people who I write about." Shawn answered. He was happy to be out of the dorms, her presence was suffocating him and he needed to leave and create. He had been doing a lot of creating lately,most of it about her, but he would never admit it.

He went over to Mandy the girl from class and found out that she had already signed him up to read since the slots were filling up quick. He and Cory took a seat at the table where Mandy sat and watched as a tall man said his piece about the state of the world today. The poem was full of anger and Shawn began to think that the poem that he had chosen for that night may be a little too flowery. He sat back and watched as person after person got up on stage and bared their soul for about 3 minutes. While he was engulfed in what others had to say, he totally missed the couple that had just walked in and settled in the back.

Angela and James grabbed some seats and James then went to get their coffee.

"Let me see if I remember, Medium, black?" he asked hoping he was right.

"Yup" she beamed.

"Yessssssss" he said as he did a mock fist pump. Angela just laughed as he walked away. Laughing was something that she hadn't done in a really long time, and she enjoyed doing it again. She was happy to be out of the dorm. She felt this unspoken tension that was causing her to have headaches everyday. She knew it was Shawn, he was sending his vibes of disdain at her everyday and she really just needed to get out and chill with someone who didn't make her crazy.

James returned with her pipping hot coffee and took his seat next to her. A blonde woman came up on stage and began to announce the next poet that would grace the stage was a virgin, so everyone should be nice to him so that he'll come back. She chuckled and then motioned for Shawn to come on up.

"Come on up Shawn." With that Shawn took off his leather jacket and took a last sip of his coffee. He stepped up on the stage, ad looked out into the crowd. He was thankful that the stage lights were bright and the house light were very low, because he couldn't see anyone in the audience, easing the fear he was feeling at that moment. Shawn took a deep breathe and introduced himself.

"Hi, um this is my first time as Mandy stated and ummm, I guess thats it really. This piece is called darkness." Shawn cleared his throat and began to recite the poem that he had wanted to say to her over and over for the past month. But she seemed happy now with James and he didn't want to screw that up.

"The love that you bestowed upon me weakened my defenses

While strengthening my desire

Our fire burned out of control and everything feed off of our beauty

See I was content with my world before

But she, she was a natural born world shaker

And thats what she did, shook my world

The intensity of her love made me ache when I was with her

Yet I ached even more when I was away, and I ache still

She could smile at me and it was pain

A pain so pleasurable that I longed for it

I was ready to drown in her, everyday

And then it was all taken away

On the day she left me my world turned black

The sun ceased to shine, while the moon refused to cast her glow

I now stumble around in a haze of anger, regret, and melancholy

My Angel left me after broken promises mended shattered dreams

And now all I can do is drain my pores of her essence

For it is the only way I know to live"

The crowd sat in silence and then started to clap, as Shawn exited the stage. He decided it was time to go. As he made his way to the door a face caught his eyes. Angela stared at Shawn, he couldn't tell if her expression was of ager, recognition, or love. But they just stared at each other a few seconds o long until she broke the gaze and went back to her conversation with James.


End file.
